Little Shaun (alias) lacked family care. He moved from one hostel to another and finally came to our Home. In the first few months of his stay, he often threw tantrums and displayed behavioral problems. He was impulsive and his self-care was poor.
Award Scheme – enhance “confidence, self-care, self-learning“
Situation like Shaun is often found in the children of our home. Thus house parents specially designed a “Star Medal Award” scheme to encourage children to develop and learn in a few areas, e.g. life skills, multiple intelligences and field training. This kind of award scheme turns the children’s hard work into measurable goals which constantly promotes self-challenge and enhance their “confidence, self-care, and self-learning” abilities.
To Shaun, this award scheme enabled him to actively improve in life skills, e.g. cleaning his face, brushing his teeth and combing his hair. Now he will take initiative to tidy his wardrobe and fold his clothes in free time. He also takes initiative to ask for more housework, such as folding garbage bags and sending them for recycling. Shaun can choose to participate in different activities according to his preferences and interests. This little boy actually chose Chinese typing and sewing!
Star Medal Award and Advanced Growth
Clear indicators of this scheme promote advancement step by step with specific goals. After the award ceremony, he showed great excitement. The medal became a concrete indicator that encouraged his active participation.
Everything happens for a reason，是陳秋源在訪問內強調的價值，童年癲沛生活，他視為磨練。「凡事要用正面去看。以前的經驗更令我珍惜家庭、珍惜子女……沒有受傷害，對我是磨練。每事happens for a reason，更令我變成better person。」兒童之家對孩子施下的恩，那是因，令不少孩子長大後回饋，包括陳秋源，除了捐獻，他身體力行在社會貢獻，也是兒家結的果。
現在與兒子無所不談，就算不愛足球，他仍樂意聽兒子講波經，覺得是一件快樂的事。（受訪者提供圖片） 陳秋源說：「Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken，建立習慣一定要從初小開始。」他後悔未有好好親自培養子女良好習慣，全職爸爸惟有更花時間、耐性慢慢去做。（受訪者提供圖片）
Ah Yu always cares about Evangel Children’s Home, and has been keeping a close “Father-son Relationship” with Yu Kwok On, Onson, the ex-house parent who helped him transit to self-reliance. Today, Ah Yu has a stable career and family. Onson praised him as being a good dad, but he said, “During my stay, I could tell from you what a good dad is like… “. This kind of love is not just about his taking care of him, but the passing on of love.
A Reborn with Strong Will
Ah Yu had been used to a loose life style and was negative at the beginning of his stay. Gradually he learnt the rules and found more freedom living in a safe environment. He finally realized what a “normal” life should be. Due to the lack of parental care since childhood and his wandering around different places, Ah Yu was more sophisticated than other children, with a strong sense of self-protection, insecurity and not easy to trust others, and got used to rely on himself.
One time Onson discovered that Ah Yu had a severe toothache and did not ask for help. He took him to the dentist personally. He got a feeling of being taken care of like his father. That was his warmest childhood memory. In fact, Ah Yu had had a toothache for a long time, and that endurance came from “willpower.” Before moving in, Ah Yu had acquired a bad habit, but he finally got rid of it by willpower. He was grateful to God for awaking him from time to time and he met many people who helped him. His strong willpower lied on his unwillingness to let down those people who love him. He was also touched by their love and he passed along the love to others.
AppleMark
“Flying Project” was organized by the Christian Lawyers Fellowship to encourage children to explore and develop their talents. For accomplishing of the plan would receive flight rewards. When Ah Yu was in upper secondary school, he knew how to cherish resources, worked hard to achieve the goals, and had the opportunity going to Singapore to broaden his horizons.
Two life coaches who influenced Ah Yu – Onson and Joe (left)
Onson and Joe, the Social Worker Supervisor, had great influence on him. Onson was a “father-like” figure, he was a caretaker providing rigorous teaching at the same time. Joe was like a life coach, guiding him with advice. Even after leaving the home, they continued to accompany with extended care.
By learning to Accept to know How to Care for Others
Ah Yu is very proud of his current career in insurance. He has been blessed by others in the past that he takes the opportunity to give back and help others now. He did not trust people in the past; and because of love, he learns to accept others’ treating him well, and to care about others. His mentality has changed, and this is helpful to his development in the workplace. The most rewarding part of Ah Yu’s insurance job is that, he has finally got a presentable career. Ah Yu works very hard and has become a manager in his early thirties.
Family．Inheritance
Ah Yu met his wife in the secondary school. They felt in love, and had gone through downs together. Knowing that he grew up sometimes not in the right path and got lost, she did not give up for him. Because of being accepted, his life had been changed, and his wife is his best intimate partner. Ah Yu thanks his wife for letting him learn to be a husband and he also learns from his daughter to be a father. He also remarked that fortunately he met Onson and Joe, who were his role models of being a father.
Ah Yu was lacked of parental care when growing up, that was why he cherished the time spent with his daughter very much. He set up “Daddy’s Time” to establish a parent-child relationship. Knowing that in order to strengthen family relationships, couples must maintain love, respect each other, and set a role model for daughters. Ah Yu and his wife understand that their different background will affect their parenting style. He also appreciates his wife’s parenting style, which is not forcing nor doting. She teaches daughters how to make choice, be responsible, and bear the consequences. Yet, he tells his wife that their daughters may go astray when they grow up. If they can grow up smoothly, it is a blessing.
Ah Yu thanked her elder daughter for giving him the opportunity to learn to be a father, and cherished the time spent with her two daughters
Message to New ECH Children
Though Ah Yu complained in the past, he is grateful to have the past experience to build him up for today, and he has built up a career and family. “Hold a normal heart in everything. Be successful “smoothly” is a good thing. If it “does not go well”, try again. You have to accept your past without too much regret.”
Sharing to Children of ECH: “ECH is a safe island. You have to cherish the opportunities and resources you have available, prepare yourself, and do not regret and complain after you leave the home!”
With the past experiences, Ah Yu ultimately has seen through the world and expressed his love and care. Because of being loved, he is able to love others.
